So it was a kind of emotional weekend, I have been wanting to write, but I have been kind of busy in the afternoons. I now am dancing 3 times a week. Classico (ballet) Monday 7:30-9, and Moderna 8-9 Wednesday and Friday. The girls are the nicest. I was kind of surprised they knew most of my classmates, but this is a small enough town that between school and extracurricular activities you kind of know everyone. Including me, there are 6 girls in my ballet class, and mmm probably 15 in my modern class. I realized just how long it's been since I did dance. I remember being so flexible, and now, nothing. But its okay, it will come. Haha All of the french words are the same, and I understand italian now so no translations are needed (but the girls like to try and translate stuff for fun it's cute!)
Anyway, lets get down to why the title is the title. I broke down twice this weekend. Alessandro laughed at me when I told him that...but like for real. I think it's usually just when there is too much drama, and when I feel like no one truly understands where I am coming from. It's difficult because my family always wants me to open up, but when they are the problem, I cant say anything. Anyway I am beating around the bush...
Saturday's lesson: Discipline methods vary from country to country or even from house to house. I wanted to learn about a new philosophy at first, but I realized that sometimes learning isn't always pretty. It's hard to take things in when its sooo different from what your used to. Why is it that we have to be put in the most difficult situations to realize how lucky we are?
Sunday evening: I was texting Elisa and asking her for help with math, we were talking a bit how I don't understand anything, and Italian math is much more confusing...she said "devi impegnarti" (basically means you need to work harder) I tried to discuss this with my family, and soon I revealed the thing that I had really been thinking for a while: here, the teachers speak, you take notes, you study, you learn, you fail, it's your fault. In the USA (and Trine said in Norway): the teachers speak, you take notes, they give you exercises you work in groups, they help you learn the material, you can email them, you fail, it's their fault and they help you learn the material. Alessia who had been telling me "cosa c'e' Sara? Dimi" (what is it Sara? Tell me.) now was telling me to talk about it later because the boys have 10+ more years of school in Italy I can't give them other ideas. This really hurt. I mean okay, so they tell me to talk to them, but when I actually have something on my mind I'm not allowed to say it. Great. Anyhow, I am feeling better now. I mean there are few people who actually get where I am coming from, but it's good to know that there are some. I wish that in the future I could come back to Italy, become a teacher, and change the way Italians are taught.
The quadremestre is coming to a close, I am feeling pretty good, I think almost all of my classes I am going to pass. Honestly I am not really worried about grades because the first 3 months I understood very little its just been this past month or two that I actually could kind of read the books on my own, but still the concepts are difficult. I think they would be difficult even if they were in English I am just proud that I have had so many passing grades :)
Love and hugs from Italy...time to get ready for math with Emanuele (Daniele's brother, he talks a lot...hopefully he is able to summarize this time)....hahaha :)
Hugs from Italy!
Oh! I forgot to add that today we got the names of the Spanish people who are coming to our school in Feburary, unfortunatly we wont be hosting because my family is already hsot ing me, but I am excited to go there. When Prof Lessie said that some parents get so attached to their host children and cry when they leave...I was like gosh give me a break, 4 days is nothing. It wasn't till like a month and a half later that I actually felt close to my family here. I hope there is not a ton of crying when we leave for spain because 1 week vs 1 year...hmm who should be more homesick? Hahaha jk jk. But yeah I am excited! I mean Spain was my first choice and now I get to go there! :D :D
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